The Beginning of The End

School starts today. But its not just any first day of school. It is the first day of Princess Penelope's Senior Year in High School. I'm sitting here, drinking my coffee wondering where the time went.

Wasn't it just last week that I took her to school on her first day of kindergarten? I can still remember how nervous, excited and just a little bit scared she was. She had this teddy bear that she carried everywhere with her and she was so brave that morning as we got out of the car and she put him in her booster car seat and buckled him in and told him that he couldn't go with her, but that she'd see him that afternoon. After taking her in to the school and walking her to class and getting her situated, I went back to my car. I took the bear out of the carseat and put him in my lap, and boo-hooed all the way to work. The teddy bear hung out at my desk with me that whole day. It doesn't seem like that was 12 years ago. It seems like last week.

So now we start on the first day of her senior year. Yesterday evening was filled with picking out just the right outfit for the first day. How does this look? How does THIS look? What do you think of these earrings with this outfit? Should I wear these shoes or those? Do I have the right school supplies? Can we go shopping once we get the offical lists? What about my hair, should I do it like this....or like this?

I wonder if I should impart words of wisdom about this year.... not just the school stuff about how this year is the foundation upon which she can build the rest of her life. But about how she will only walk this way once. She will only get one senior year of high school. About how she should treasure these friends she surrounds herself with now because she WILL lose touch with some of them. Different college choices, different life choices, and different opportunities will take her and her friends on different paths. About how life will change after this year, and it will never be quite the same, so she needs to enjoy it. And savor it. And not wish it away. I know that's what I'll be doing.

Right now, I'm hearing Paramore blasting from her room and all of the other noises associated with getting off to school. Hairdryer running, drawers opening and shutting, the clack of hangers as they are tossed on the floor. And still I see that sweet little girl, fastening the teddy bear's seat belt as she prepares to face the first day of real school. I think I may be boo-hooing all the way to work again today.